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Space Force Soliders of Fortune needed

Why live a life of quiet humility on Planet Earth, when you can work for Space Force 7, spreading merchandise throughout the farthest reaches of the tri-galaxy region? Induct new planets, put your life in abject danger, restock vending machines with space diapers and work on straight commission with free use of Space Force 7 headquarters coffee machine. For more information, please send a self-addressed, stamped envelope to:
Chief of Space Force 7
Op. No. 107001 0000000000 11209 4

For faster consideration, please include a small tribute in outer envelope. Crypto currencies and sticks of Fruit Stripe Gum welcome.